Keith was the 4th child in our family and was born when I was 6, my older sister was 7 and my brother Chris was 4. In 1970 Keith was the 38th most popular boys name. That statistic would have been meaningless to me except that my brother Keith died in April of 2009 at the age of 38. Today he would have turned 51, but to me he will perpetually be 38 until we are reunited in Heaven.
My parents are still living and as of this writing live in the same house as they did when Keith was born. I was visiting them yesterday and I forgot all about it being Keith's birthday today. It wasn't until this morning at announcements at school that I realized it was Veteran's day. My first 3 classes today were teaching 2nd grade, kindergarten and 1st grade art classes. It was strange to remember that I was in first grade when Keith was born and unsettling to realize Keith's children were in Kindergarten and 2nd grade respectively when he passed away.
I used to think of Keith all the time after he passed away. Over the years I haven't forgotten him or anything like that, but 12 1/2 years of life has moved on while Keith remains more or less at a fixed point in time. I'm feeling a bit of survivor's guilt today. My children have grown up or are in the process of growing up with both their parents. My niece and nephew lost their Dad before they were even tweens. I remember what a loving father Keith was to his kids but it makes me sad that they don't have many memories of him at all.
Over the years I have endeavored to stand in as much for Keith as I could for his children. I will continue to do my best in that regard, but today I'm just a guy who misses his brother.
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