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Three Dave's No Waiting

Sunday, January 16, 2011

A part of me died today.

In 2001, during the time that we were expecting spider droid, an amazing journey began. It started for us at our church when this man Ray came up to the podium at the end of the service to say that his kidneys were failing and that without a miracle he would have to go on dialysis for the rest of his life. I didn't know Ray very well at the time, but Amy and I were friends with his daughter and her fiance. After Ray spoke, I had this strange feeling like I could give my kidney to Ray. I immediately talked to Amy about it because it's her kidney too.

I said to Amy I could give my kidney to Ray and she said yeah I guess, not thinking that I was serious. Not knowing that she wasn't taking me seriously, I went up to Ray and said you could have my kidney. He explained to me that there was a number of tests that needed to be performed that it was fairly unlikely that since we weren't related that we would match. But if I was interested I could take the tests.

So , I took the tests. In the meantime Amy and I got on the same page on the whole donation thing. I have to be honest, I kind of figured that I would not be a match. It turns out that I was a match as close as a match that was possible outside of sibling, parents and children. Because the illness causing kidney problems was hereditary it turned out to be better to get a donor who wouldn't be susceptible to that illness.

Thus, in December of 2001 just about a month after Spider Droid was born, I donated my kidney to Ray. For me it was a simple procedure. After a week or so I was back to work part time. A few months later it was like nothing happened. For Ray it was a long regimen of anti- rejection medication and trying to get those medications to jibe with all his other medications. But even with all that, the kidney did function properly.

About 2 months ago, Ray started having major health problems and became unable to eat any food. He was in the hospital through Christmas and it was finally discovered that he had lung cancer. The doctors started to begin radiation treatments but the prognosis was anything but good. Last week after 9 years, his kidney failed, and he had to begin dialysis.

Ray died this evening. He was with his wife and daughters singing hymns and praising God. I am sad for his passing but am glad to have been part of his amazing story.

Please pray for his wife, Dawn, his daughters, Mandy and Michelle, his sons in law, Ray and Aaron, and his grandchildren, siblings and the rest of his friends and family.


  1. What an incredible gift that 9 years was, and what an incredible man you are (and incredible family you have) for doing what you did.

    Peace and prayers going aloft for Ray's family...and to you all.

  2. Wow! That is incredible. Thank you for sharing.

  3. It was a wonderful thing that you did for him. I am so sorry for your loss now.


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